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    如何寫好周記,周記小技巧.教你寫周記注意的10點

    發布時間:2019-05-07 15:58 編輯:涪陽小學編輯

    ?作文如何寫外貌?

    孩子的作文里總會看到類似這樣的名子:“XX可漂亮了,她有一頭卷卷的黃頭發,有一雙烏黑的葡萄般的大眼睛,有一個高高的鼻子,還有一張櫻桃小嘴。”如果你試著讓他們去掉文中的“有”,把文字重新串聯一遍,會發現作文順了很多。

    寫上段文字的同學經老師指導后修改如下:“XX可漂亮啦。一頭卷卷的黃頭發自然地披在肩上。她的眼睛太吸引人了,烏黑烏黑葡萄一般。高高的鼻子,和櫻桃小嘴配合起來,有點混血的味道,同學們可喜歡她啦。”是不是讀起來舒服多了?

     

    ?讓孩子比較以下三句話。

     

    張三說:“……”;張三無可奈何地說:“……”;張三攤了攤手,一副無可奈何的樣子:“……”顯然,讓人物說話有多種方式,寫語言可以不用出現“說”而是在語言前面加上動作和神態,通過一定的訓練掌握這樣的技巧讓孩子的寫作水平切實得到提升,讓他們學會細節描寫,不會僅干巴巴的地寫“某某說”。

     

    遇到描寫心理活動時,這樣的句子已經被孩子們寫濫:“我腦子里跳出兩個小人,一個小人……另一個小人……”不用這個句子又該怎么寫?最常用的就是“我心想”。

     

    如某學生寫:“數學老師出了一道難題要帶回家寫的。我心想:天哪!這該怎么辦呢?”按照老師“寫想不用想”的技巧,去掉:“我心想”三個字如何?“數學老師出了一道難題要帶回家寫的。天哪!這該怎么辦呢?”是不是更簡潔精練?別忘了提醒孩子要給心理描寫加上適當感嘆詞。

     

    都是成語惹的禍!不是說多用成語才顯得有文采嗎?作文其實不然,在“就是不用成語”寫作技巧中,老師指出:當作文中只會按照套路使用成語時,文章細節就沒了,還不如讓孩子老老實實把自己看到的感受都寫出來。

    什么天高云淡、風和日麗、桃紅柳綠、炯炯有神、心曠神怡……這些被用濫的成語還是少出現為妙。比如,寫春天別用“風和日麗”,而是這樣寫:“風兒拂過林梢,原本平靜的湖面漾起了圈圈漣漪,湖邊的柳樹輕搖著身姿,我也忍不住張開雙臂,任風撫過我的每一寸肌膚,暖暖的,癢癢的。”

     

    想辦法用具體的句子替換掉別人用濫的成語,解決孩子作文寫不長寫不細的難題。

     

    一想對于文章寫不長的孩子,可以訓練的另一個技巧是:遇到“很”和“非常”想一想。

     

    看過無數學生習作,發現出現頻率最高的字眼包括“很,非常”,請家長提醒孩子,遇到要寫這幾個字時不要輕易下筆,停下來想一想,是不是非要出現這個字眼?比如寫熱,別出現“很熱”兩個字,學會用其他的描寫來體現熱:驕陽似火,沒有一絲風,樹葉低垂毫無生氣……文章自然就能寫長。
     

    到了五六年級孩子都要學習環境描寫。

    如有的孩子會寫:“早上天氣還挺好的,放學回家時,卻嘩嘩下起雨來。雨珠在下,淚珠在滴,老天也好像在為我哭泣。”孩子能用環境襯托自己的心情首先要表揚。

     

    但是很多孩子只要一寫環境,肯定就是小花微笑,小草點頭、小鳥歌唱、小雨哭泣,成了套路,難道世界上只有小草、小鳥、小花嗎?為什么不能寫身邊更真實的東西呢?云、霧、桌子,哪怕是電線桿都可以寫,這個技巧是提醒孩子不僅要讓人活在環境里,還要讓人活在真實的環境里。

     

    文章要一波三折才好看,但現在的孩子生活都很平淡,你不能強求他們寫出一波三折的內容,那就讓他們學會一波三折地使用動詞,就這是要動連著動——學會連續使用動詞,某學生寫一場乒乓球球賽:“他發了一個旋轉球,讓人看得眼花繚亂。”(一句話把文章就給寫完了)

    學會動詞技巧后將修改成:“只見他高高地將球拋起,眼睛死死盯著,球接觸球板的一瞬間,他手腕輕輕一抖,腳一跺,球高速旋轉著,向這邊飛來,讓人看得眼花繚亂。”

     

    一個動詞轉瞬變成六七個,文字即刻靈動豐富起來。
     

    還是針對作文寫不長的一種技巧訓練:用三百字來描寫1秒鐘內發生的事。

    如關于破校運會跳高紀錄瞬間的描寫原本只有幾十字:只見某某縱身一跳,一下子飛過橫桿,新的校運會紀錄誕生了!怎么變成三百字?可以有條理地加上動作解剖:如何助跑、起跳、翻越、落地;加上聯想:往屆校運會有人挑戰失敗,平時如何一次次練習等等;還可以加上細節來充實,起跳前如何與同學們進行眼神交流,成功后同學如何向他祝賀……家長可以找一些1秒鐘的素材讓孩子進行寫作練習,學會了這個技巧還怕考試寫不出四五百字嗎?

     


    很多孩子不會用標點,習作中常只有逗號句號逗號句號,甚至逗號都沒有,把老師讀到斷氣為止。

    針對這個現象,可以讓孩子進行“一段話至少出現6種標點”的技巧訓練。比如,。?!……:“”這些標點你的作文中都有嗎?沒有的話請嘗試用起來。

    經過幾次訓練后,你會發現孩子的驚人變化:意味深長的句子會寫了、人物語言會加進去了,心理活動結合進去了,還會用反問句了,這些句子加進去后,文章當然生動起來。

    一位作家就曾用這種方法對自己作文寫不好的孩子進行訓練,收效明顯,進步很快。



     
     

    這個技巧說白了就是學習寫短句。

    學了一段時間寫作的孩子容易在作文中寫長句,而長句寫不好就變成病句。

    事實上很多作家也是以寫短句見長的,像沈從文、汪曾祺。家長要提醒孩子注意控制每句話的字數,建議把十幾個字幾十個字的長句改成只有三四五個字的短句,孩子們會發現這樣的作文有語感會舒服很多。

    如某學生的原文:“高高的綠綠的草散發著誘人的清香。一根一根都看得那么清楚,很挺拔的樣子。”經指導后改成:“草綠了,高了,散發著清香。一根一根,看得清清楚楚,很挺拔的樣子。”是不是很有節奏感?


    上一篇:老師教你怎么寫周記 下一篇:沒有了
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